I am reading a book which, I will recommend, or not, when I finish reading it. This book asks four questions on the second chapter that I will be answering here, in public. I believe that if I am honest and straight forward, I will get more out of the experience of the book and it will validate what I am thinking and feeling as truth.
1) What is bothering me most right now?
There are several things that are bothering me right now, both physical and emotional.
I have come to realize that I am living in a very absurd society, where not one person, is willing to take responsibilities for their own situation. As I am learning now, there is your business, my business, and God's business. The problem is when your lack of concern for your business creates a situation where your negative energy can affect my business. We live in a neighborhood where it seems that there are two sides on the issues that pertain to the neighborhood and both sides are more interested in being right than they are about doing the right thing. Since I live in this neighborhood, at the end of the day, this affects my standard of living, and it is causing some stress.
The second thing that it is bothering me a little, is the education system in my country. Today, my daughter was supposed to be in a review at school for the college board exam. But the kids decided to go on strike (apparently, in my country, the only way to fix anything is by going on strike). My daughter came home and she was disappointed. That is not my problem, it is hers, but her disappointment hurts me.
The third thing that is bothering me is that I am always tired. Whether I eat right or not, sleep well or not, and exercise, or not, I still feel tired all day. I try not to lay down because if I did, I would probably sleep all day and all night. Out of the three, I realize, the only one that is my problem is the last one.
2) What do I think are the material causes? What have I tried? What works? What does not?
For the first thing, the cause is the immaturity of the members of the neighborhood in question. I am working on a letter that I will be sending the association to start observing what they are actually doing to improve the conditions of my neighborhood.
For the second one, the causes are a few ill intentioned people, the Health Department, the Water Department, the school administration and the students. Apparently this is not a new problem, but instead of letting the parents know, the kids took the law into their own hands. In the meantime, it does not seem that the administration is doing a great job.
On the third problem, the causes seem to be inadequate diet and lack of medical care. Due to our current economic situation, I hesitate to go to the doctor because right now I have no insurance and if my doctor finds something before I get the insurance, then it will be deemed a pre-existing condition and not be covered. I have tried to sleep more, eat better and exercise at least half an hour a day. It seems to be working some times.
3) What are the emotional components?
All the problems cause me stress, which makes me hiper, which probably has a hand on making me feel even more tired.
4) Is there a higher lesson? Am I taking it in or resisting?
If I was still working I would think that the higher lesson is relax and take care of less stuff. But I am not working right now. I think the lesson is still, relax and don't try to bite more than you can chew. Some times I do it right and some times I just take on even more responsibility.
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